This article contains graphic images.
Fashion photographer, accused sexual assault assailant, and “tampon tea” connoisseur Terry Richardson is going to be a dad. Over the weekend, he and girlfriendAlexandra “Skinny” Bolotow celebrated the upcoming birth of their twins by throwing a baby shower, and in true Richardson style he ditched the traditional for the explicitly offensive.
Richardson’s Instagram account reveals the couple went for a full-blown penis theme, forgoing the usual pastels and baby animals and replacing them with items like penis-patterned tablecloths.
Condoms in custom-designed wrappers were readily available, presumably as party favors.
And, naturally, Richardson (known for his nude photographs and for often being naked himself) chose an anatomically correct cake.
The graphic decorations and catering are bound to offend and shock some people (likely the point). But given the cookie-cutter convention of traditional baby showers, others may see the theme as liberating, even inspiring. If you are among those who dig this unconventional approach, here are some tips for recreating a shower of this nature for yourself.
1) Decorations
If you think that Richardson’s baby shower looks a lot like a bachelorette party, that’s probably because the decorations are, indeed, designed for bachelorettes. The Bachelorette Party Superstore sells many products in the “Let’s Party!” line of decorations featured in Richardson’s Instagram photo. They are currently all sold out of the tablecloths, paper plates, and favor bags, but perhaps that’s just an indication of Richardson’s influence.
For decorating your off-color baby shower, you might want to peruse the bachelorette aisle of your local party shop. You’ll find plenty of penis-themed decorations there.
But if you don’t quite find what you’re looking for, don’t be afraid to get creative and DIY.
2) Food
It goes without saying that, if you’re going to have a truly irreverent baby shower, you’re going to need to buy or bake a graphically decorated cake. If the more than 1,500#vaginacake posts on Instagram are any indication, such cakes are actually quite the trend, even among people who might not normally lump themselves in with the likes of Richardson.
When choosing your cake, you’ll want to decide whether you want a basic vulva made from icing…
…or if you prefer one that emulates actual childbirth.
Whichever your pleasure, Wicked Goodies has an excellent tutorial on how to bake and design your own.
3) Party Games
It’s always fun to take a traditional party game and turn it on its side. In the case of a non-traditional baby shower, this might mean playing a round of Pin the Sperm on the Ovaries.
There are also the gross-out games that really prepare new parents for what they should expect in those early months. For those who have strong stomachs, Guess the Pooptypically played with melted chocolatesis another favorite.
Go forth and host your wildly inappropriate baby shower: There’s no need to stick with traditions that don’t speak to you, and it never hurts to laugh a bit before embarking on the serious responsibilities of parenthood.
As for Richardson and Bolotow’s twins, they are due this spring. Let’s hope they’ll be prepared for the inevitable day when they stumble upon their father’s Instagram.
Screengrab via TerryRichardsonTV/YouTube