Khloe Kardashian’s Talk Show Is (Probably) Bullshit

Khloe Kardashian is the least attractive (and therefore least important) of the Jenner/Kardashian girls, but every time I bring up this infallible point people get all pissy, saying that Khloe is a cool Kardashian who’s not like other Kardashians. Whether she’s getting diseases she’s way too rich to get, distributing child pornography or hawking medieval torture devices, people defend her. We’ll see how long that lasts, however, as her stupidly-named talk show looks like it’s running into some serious problems.

Issue #1: Khloe probably can’t (or at least won’t) cook

Kocktails With Khloe claims to feature Khloe in the kitchen “cooking, drinking booze and gossiping.” Which, ok, cool. Except, as TMZ pointed out last week, Khloe’s claims to domesticity are dubious at best. A pic she Instagrammed of pies she supposedly baked…

I am sooooo proud of myself lol can I say that??? I filmed on a tripod, in my kitchen a lot of me baking and prepping for today so I will have that up on my app soon!!! I love testing myself and seeing what I can accomplish and actually make successfully! Now let’s pray it tastes as great as they look! This monkey bread is going to be so fucking bomb

A photo posted by Khlo (@khloekardashian) on

Nov 26, 2015 at 11:32am PST

… were actually pies she bought from a retailer called Sweet Lady Jane (and even arranged in the same fucking order). Now, I like to cook because it’s easily in my top-20 ways to feed myself, but I also order food from time to time because cooking is not nearly as rewarding as Instagram makes it seem. I have no problem with that. But I do have a problem with someone being so openly full of shit and hoping no one notices. Go ahead, remind me again of how Khloe is the “real” one when she can’t even be bothered to bake a fucking pie ahead of her talk show that hinges on her cooking. Not that it matters, because…

Issue #2: No one wants to fucking be on her show anyway

That’s right! According to RadarOnline, the show’s producers are having a hard time getting anyone famous (other than her family) to come on the show:

HAHAHA. A moderately famous person is giving other famous people a free outlet through which to become even MORE famous, and no one will touch this dumpster fire with a 10-foot pole. She’s apparently still “super involved” in the process, and doesn’t care that no one wants to be on her show because she has her friends and family to support her. Yeah, ok Khloe.

Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like 30 minutes of watching Khloe in her kitchen drinking, alone, pondering how success and fame are not the same as being liked, would be the the greatest Christmas gift of all.