I know, I know. Somewhere between your blackout tequila parties, enviable closet, circle of betches, and being super hardcore amazing, you forgot to learn how to cook. Maybe its mommy fault; perhaps your slave maid never taught you growing up or didnt speak enough English to explain how a proper taco is made. These things happen. Now, as a supposedly running adult, people like, expect you to know how to cook an omelet or roast a chicken or stimulate something other than cereal and pasta. And it isnt okay. Somewhere the world has failed you and were here to help make it right. Here are 10 handy tips-off for the betch who, for whatever reason, never genuinely learned to cook for herself.

1. Buy A Lot Of Salad

If youre genuinely afraid of the oven, best get used to inducing salads. We suggest you stockpile shit like arugula, romaine, spring mixture, and spinach for interesting salad beds. For toppings, always have shit like shredded or disintegrated cheesethink cheddar, blue, and fetatomatoes, cucumbers, red onion, peppers, and olives. Thatll give you a solid start for an assortment of salads. Also, keep some balsamic vinaigrette and olive oil on hand for dressingmaybe buy a NICE bottle of Caesar dressing, too.

2. Chickens Are Your Friends

You know how there are always an assortment of pre-made rotisserie chickens either near the salad bar or at the checkout line at the grocery store? Actually no, you wouldnt know that. Well, head to your local purveyor of food and grab one. Its already roasted so all you have to do is eat it. Shred it and add it to your salad, break off a leg and nom, or add some to pasta for an ACTUAL meal.

3. Get Used To Smoothies

Since you have all those veggies on hand for your salads, grab some fruit, too, and build smoothies. Theyre a good meal replacement and you dont have to actually cook anything. Grab some plain Greek yogurt, a banana, some strawberries, and mix for a delicious breakfast. Chewing your food is overrated anyway.

4. Pasta Is Sometimes Acceptable

You do not need to know how to cook to build pasta. Unless youre literally an moron and dont realize that you need to simmer water to make this shit( I knew a girl who literally did not realize this is a crucial step ), youve got a meal. Boil water, add salt( not even mandatory tbh ), drop pasta, cook for like 8-10 mins, taste test, drain. BOOM. Dinner. Fuck, lets find Raquel and get her to add cheese for CHEESY PASTA, which, Im pretty sure requires you to sprinkle on some Parmesan, salt, pepper, and butter. Is it super healthy? Not totally, but its good for filling you up on a shitty, rainy night when cook is overrated anyway.

5. Steer Clear Of Rice

If you cannot cook, do not attempt to induce rice. Why? Because it requires you to leave the pot alone, which anyone who cannot cook will not be able to do. If youre craving grains, get some quinoa or barley which dont necessitate much skill to prepare. Shit, you could even find some minute microwavable rice. It isnt that badjust check the sodium on any microwavable foods.

6. Get A Crock Pot

Whats easier than throwing a bunch of ingredients into a pot, hitting a button, and walking away? Literally nothing. If you cannot cook, buy a crock pot. It requires no skill to throw in a few chicken breasts, peppers, onions, and tomatoesthus creating a lovely dinner. You can also build fondue in it( of the chocolate or cheese range ), which constructs it a staple of any betch kitchen.

7. Pass The Ploughman’s Plate

Have you ever heard of this? Its your lucky day. Considered a legit dinner across the Atlantic, the ploughmans plate is literally a plate filled with cheese, bread, pickles and occasionally crackers, fruit, and hard-boiled eggs. It touches on literally all of the food groups and will totally fill you up, even if it voices literally disgusting. So if all you can deal with is arranging some cheese and bread on a plate, congrats. Youre doing it right.

8. Beware Of Frozen Entrees

If you loathe getting near the oven but want a home-cooked tasting snack, peruse the frozen section. Lots of pre-steamed veggies can be hurled immediately into the microwave. Same goes for some pre-made chicken and fish items. Just check the sodium and calorie counts. THATS WHERE THEY GET CHA.

9. Pre-Packaged Food Isn’t All Bad

So youre craving salmon but a) cant cook and b) none of your takeout joints have it. Get your ass to the grocery store, find pre-portioned frozen wild catch Atlantic salmon and bring it home. Grab one of the filets, defrosted by leaving in a hot water bath for 15 minutes, cut open the package, and set it on a baking sheet or piece of foil in the oven with a little salt and pepper. Cook for 20 -2 5 minutes at 250 F and BOOM. Youll have literally amazing, juicy salmon that you are able to snowflake and put over pasta or top off your salad. This isnt difficult AT ALL.

10. When In Doubt, Take Out

Obviously if youre not a cook, you need to learn what takeout is okay and what is not. Yeah, a pizza once a month wont kill you, but it isnt doing you any favors, either. Opt for salads with garmenting on the side, entrees that mention nothing about sauces and cheese, and the less bread, the better.

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